Rating: B-
Dir: Derek Braasch, Marcelo Fabani, James Panetta, Todd Sheets
Star: Tiffany Sinclair, Mike Reeb, Stan Lubo, Phil Herman
“For decades, the Amityville legacy has been diluted, exploited – reduced to pale imitations and hollow attempts.” So begins… yep, another entry in the Amityville-ploitation genre. We went there just last month with the largely dreadful Amityville Island, and at the time, vowed to follow the advice of The Who: Won’t Get Fooled Again. But here we are, a few weeks later. On the plus side, this came from Herman, whose anthologies have generally been at least adequately entertaining (and sometimes, more than that) in the past. So, I’m dipping my toe in again. Flying solo though here, Chris still not having forgiven me for Island. I like my marriage, and would prefer to keep it.
Bit of a rough start, with a particularly terrible bit of acting from a “TV newscaster”, in what seems like an advert promoting the Kickstarter campaign… of the film we are watching? We then get the wraparound segment, with Dr. Evelyn Marsh (Sinclair) introducing each story. The basic concept is that the Amityville curse has spreads across the country, affecting people, places and objects nationwide. Which does, at least, free the film up from having to worry about location or continuity with the legend. This begins with Sheets’s The Shed, in which a plan to recover stolen loot goes demonically awry, until kung-fu priest Father Anson (Reeb) shows up, strangling one demon with his own intestines. TIL demons have intestines. It’s dumb, gory fun (top): in other words, just what I wanted and expected.
Next is The Possessed Relic from regular contributor Fabani, which proves the Amityville curse has reached South America. It stars Lubo as a man who becomes obsessed with a chair. There’s a nice sense of foreboding, with a countdown from a week before. But the build-up here is better than the payoff. Third is Braasch’s Blood Moon Over Amityville. It’s likely the slightest of the stories, with a cop being haunted by the ghosts of those he failed. That’s basically it. But it sets up the final part, Echoes of the Damned, by Panetta, in which Jack (Herman) and Megan (Debbie D) move into their new home – built on the site of previous deadly paranormal activity.
This is really the only one which feels like a “true” Amityville story (though I was amused how the shed in… um, The Shed had the “eye window” thing going on!). But I’m fine with that: haunted houses are kinda done to death. Fortunately, this doesn’t outstay its welcome, despite being the longest segment. While it unfolds almost exactly as haunted house stories do, there are little moments which I liked. For example, the neighbours seem to pop up out of nowhere, in a way which feels it would fit an episode of Inside No. 9. Bonus points for genre legend Vernon Wells, as Megan’s father. All told, a solid little anthology: a couple of good stories, and no real clunkers, beyond some painfully amateur acting between segments. That’s better than most. My faith in Amityville is restored! Well, somewhat…
[Look for the film to be released in late summer]