Sex Terrorists on Wheels (2019)

Rating: C+

Dir: Stefan Ruf
Star: Justin Henry, Larissa Dali, Jecca Bitner, Gary Kent
a.k.a. Motorpsycho Maniacs

“Just rape her enough so she knows who’s boss!” That line, along with either of the movie’s titles, are probably sufficient to tell you whether you have any interest in watching this. It doesn’t exactly hide its sleazy, grindhouse aspirations under a bushel, though the gap between ambition and execution is sometimes obvious. The titular biker gang are spreading terror across Esperanza County, Texas, under the leadership of Lobo the Wolf (Henry) – yeah, his name is “Wolf the Wolf”, in the same way “The Los Angeles Angels” translates as “The The Angels Angels”. He’s backed by psychotic, jealous sidekick Jezebel (Bitner), and pursued by a pair of Texas Rangers who have already captured Enyo, the notorious She Beast of Devil’s Mountain (Dali).

Things start as they mean to go on, a couple attempting to negotiate a drug-deal with the Sex Terrorists, which ends up going very wrong. Not for nothing is one of the gang called Liver-Eating Larson. There are scalpings, female nudity, removal of body parts and rape. Basically, rinse and repeat these elements for the remainder of the 78 minute running time, in a variety of configurations and with the details i.e. specific body part, varied slightly. I’m fairly sure every single actress in the movie takes her top off at some point, though this is not necessarily a good thing, shall we say. Also wandering around Ezra (Kent), a shaman-like blind wanderer, with mystic powers, and who can talk to animals, including Max the least-authentic “coyote” ever on film.

If the original inspiration is the biker movies of the sixties (in some of which Kent appeared), it never convinces particularly on that front, not least because the hogs here are more of the “annoyed bumble-bee” variety, rather than choppers or Harley Davidsons. The most relevant lineage here is the work of Troma, for the bulk of this is a conscious exercise in thoroughly bad taste. There should be something to offend everyone, from the wholesale cultural appropriation (top) to blunt stabs at political satire: Lobo proclaims both “Black Lives Matter” and “Grab ’em by the pussy”. Naturally, this makes it impossible to take seriously, so it ends up being largely disposable fluff, without any lasting impact.

The movie does suffer somewhat from a plot twist, in which one character is revealed as not being what they seem. This leads to an abrupt shift in focus down the stretch, with the previously dominant figure of Lobo sidelined until the film’s finale, back at the bridge where it all started [Hey, if you’re a low-budget film-maker, and you get a good location, make the most of it!] Things might have worked better had this character been central from the get-go. While Ruf delivers the sex and violence with enthusiastic glee, he seems a bit less sure of what to do with the dramatic elements; no surprise that Kent, the actor with the most experience, clearly fares best in this department. Still, I can’t say I was ever bored, and that’s what matters, isn’t it?