Rating: B-
Dir: Eli Roth
Star: Keanu Reeves, Lorenza Izzo, Ana de Armas, Ignacia Allamand
When I originally watched this back in 2020, I didn’t know it was a remake, and I think Roth does a lot of things right, adding his own spin to proceedings. I know a lot of people loathe the film with a passion. I can certainly see why. It’s certainly not Keanu’s best performance: I suspect the role may have been more suited to Nicolas Cage. One monologue in particular feels like pure, undiluted Cage; we’ll get to that later. But I suspect it was made with greater satirical intent than generally allowed. I mean, it literally takes place on a dark and stormy night, and is basically nightmare fuel for any happily married, middle-aged man. Anyone else just won’t understand…
Here, a dream scenario (in a Penthouse Letters kind of way) goes inevitably, relentlessly and horrifically off-script. Mild-mannered architect Evan Webber (Reeves) is the perfect man: loving father and husband to Karen (Allamand), to an almost excruciating extent – again, the satire. He has to stay behind and work when his family go off for the weekend. As the rain pours down, a knock on the door reveals two lost, dripping wet, young slices of free pizza, Genesis (Izzo) and Bel (de Armas). Politely inviting them in to wait for an Uber, the girls start coming on and won’t take no for an answer. Eventually, even Evan has to crack – only to find the next morning, they won’t leave, have several screws loose, and are intent on wrecking his life.
In contrast to both original inspiration Death Game and unofficial remake Vicious and Nude, the male victim feels significantly more sympathetic – as noted, to an almost parodic degree. However, a theme which remains consistent across all three films is the generation gap, and to some extent the gender gap too. The middle-aged man and the young women might as well come from different planets, and the film makes good use of social media to accentuate that point. Though Roth was in his forties when he made this, and married to Izzo, so the gap can be bridged. On the other hand, they divorced a few years after he filmed her bonking Keanu here, and Izzo then went lesbo. Read whatever into all that.
It’s pure morality melodrama, with Reeves being made to face the consequences of a momentary lapse in fidelity. If the satirical nature wasn’t clear enough before, we then get a glorious rant from Evan, which is what left me feeling like Cage might have been a better fit for the role. “What was I supposed to do? You sucked my cock, you both fucking sucked my cock! It was FREE PIZZA! Free fuckin’ pizza! It just shows up at my fuckin’ door! What am I supposed to do?” Certainly an odd choice of film for Reeves in the wake of John Wick, but I ain’t going to deny, I enjoyed most of the increasingly ludicrous and hysterical moments. Does the use at the end of Where is my Mind? – as in Fight Club – indicate it was all in Evan’s head? We’ll never know.