Rating: C
Dir: Brendan Petrizzo
Star: Natasha Tosini, Chris Lines, Lewis Santer, Stephen Staley
Few places are sadder than a British seaside resort out of season. Though it’s more a mournful sense of loss and vague emptiness, than a “you’re going to get stabbed repeatedly by a hideous monster with the head of a deformed rodent” kind of way. Guess which direction this takes? Mad scientist and former high-security prisoner Dr. Rupert Mouse (Lines), has set up his lab with a sea-view, and the aim of continuing his unsanctioned experiments. These have already created the creature previously mentioned (Santer), as well as “Bear” (Staley), who might perhaps resemble another beloved character, recently to enter the public domain. Next up? A bride for them, constructed from parts hacked off tourists and locals.
Meanwhile, Chloe (Tosini) is preparing to head off to California, and a farewell party of sorts has been organized overnight at the fairground. Absolutely no prizes for guessing how that goes: as well as such nocturnal excursions usually do. The bulk of this is straightforward stalk and slash. The two monstrous siblings – the rodent in particular, though the makers seem curiously unwilling to name names – chases Chloe and her pals about, knocking them off, one by one. Because “leaving” or “calling the police” doesn’t seem like it’s an option that occurs to any of them. In its location, this is not dissimilar to The Mouse Trap‘s arcade, though at least that had doors which the killers could lock.
An absence of logic aside – and we are talking about a slasher movie here, so it goes with the territory – this isn’t awful. The dysfunctional family of Dr. Mouse and his two “sons” is a nice twist, even though he looks more like a vagrant biker than a physician. A white coat was apparently too much to ask. It’s a shame the “Bride” is only marginally glimpsed at the end: do film-makers know that Minnie Mouse is in the public domain too? Despite the British location – the fairground is Knightly’s, located in North Wales – Petrizzo and a few other people involved here, are Asylum refugees. So they know their way around low-budget horror; was amused to see Anthony C. Ferrante’s band, Quint, providing most of the music.
Their experience helps deliver the necessary energy, which goes some way to countering the industrial-strength stupidity of the plot and characters. Santer puts a bit of effort into giving his mouse some touches of character too. Eventually, dissension in the ranks, largely fostered by he and Bear’s ‘father’, pits the two monsters against each other, in a fight whose conclusion I still didn’t understand, after multiple viewings. Oh, well. I was just about adequately amused, and that’s what matters. It feels like this is intended as the start of another horror ‘universe’; Chloe’s dad is writing a book called Mouseboat Massacre, and that’s the title of an upcoming film, in which Tosini stars. I’m not sure if that should be regarded as a promise or a threat.