Rating: B-
Dir: Chi Lo
Star: Siu-Lung Leung, Ie Lung Shen, Ching Tang, Alexander Grand
a.k.a. Deadly Hands of Kung Fu
I have previously avoided the “Clones of Bruce Lee” films, because I’m sure the majority suck farts out of dead dogs. Nobody can hope to be more than a pale imitation of Lee, so what’s the point? But a friend brought this one to my attention – thanks, Andy! – and it did not disappoint. It’s a totally mad concept, executed with laudable commitment to the idea, regardless of its ludicrous nature. Bruce Lee (Leung, credited as Bruce Leong) dies and goes to the underworld, where he gets involved in a power struggle between the reigning monarch (Tang) and a procession of characters, shamelessly lifted from popular culture around the world.
Y’know those public domain horror films? It’s like that, except with no regard for copyright. Or, to be honest, accuracy in a lot of cases. For example, we do get a James Bond (Grand). However, beyond the tuxedo, he looks nothing like 007, though his sideburns may have their own license to kill. If it wasn’t for the soundtrack playing the famous theme, you’d be forgiven for not recognizing him. Similarly, there’s a supposed “Godfather” character (Shen), who looks nothing like Marlon Brando. An exorcist? Sure. But the English dub gives him an outrageous French accent, for no reason I can figure out. Was Max Van Sydow dubbed by Inspector Clouseau when The Exorcist was released in Hong Kong?
At least the Man With No Name has the hat and the poncho, and “Emmanuelle”… Well, she gets her kit off, so that’s accurate enough. Popeye, who also shows up as an ally to Bruce, may be the most accurate, with his pipe, jaunty hat, and spinach super-strength. He’s played by Eric Tsang, whose career has gone on to much better things, like Infernal Affairs. Also on Bruce’s side is Cain from the TV series Kung Fu, and the one-armed swordsman made famous by Jimmy Wang Yu. Opposing him, in addition to the characters in the paragraph above, are Zatoichi the blind swordsman, and Dracula – who controls an army of zombie ninjas. Must be scenes exclusive to the Hong Kong print, because I don’t recall Christopher Lee ever doing that.
It is mostly an excuse for moderate kung-fu fights, with occasional broad humour, such as people mistaking Bruce’s nunchucks for his penis (top). Once the initial shock from the blatant violation of intellectual property wears off, it doesn’t have an enormous amount to offer. But for the first twenty minutes, your jaw will be getting acquainted with your lap, and for that alone, I found it worth my time. The film opens with an apparently sincere dedication to the fans of Bruce Lee, and to be fair, the icon is treated with relative honour – compared to the other characters, anyway, and despite the dick jokes. Then again, the original title translates as “Lee Three Legs Power Shakes the Gates of Hell”, so who the hell knows?